Catherine Griske

Memories of Catherine (aka Mona)
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Mona’s life was so well-lived. She was always so loving and nurturing, the “little sister” to my Dad and Uncle Tom, who as a young child watched them go to war. The devoted daughter to aging parents who weathered the loss of both with strength and an abiding faith that they were at peace. The young Aunt who adored us all, and made us feel so special as little kids and beyond.
She was my Godmother, who always remembered my birthday with a generous gift and a card “right on time,” which made me feel celebrated and special, in a sea of nieces and nephews. I remember her as a young adult coming to stay with us in West Islip, and the many fun days running up and down the stairs on Boyd Ave. in the Bronx, as the many Ryan’s and McTernan’s convened. She was kind, and so smart, and humble.
And playful, as she many times repeated my fresh remark as a 4 year old when I said to Jeannie Cregan (who I called “Jeannie Chickens”) “I hates kids what’s got freckles.” She then gave me a robe for Christmas with chickens on it:) Jeannie knew I was jealous because she always played with Mary Jane, so that is a bit of history that’s ok to say:) I loved Jeannie too! And to our delight as young teens, we witnessed her great joy in marrying a handsome guy named Mike and her joy doubled as her beautiful boy Ryan later came along. The love and devotion she gave to her family was boundless. So now Aunt Mona can rest in God’s peace, knowing that we know, she is there, and that while here, she did it all right, and left a legacy of love.
Niece Barbara Ryan
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Cathy was a great student in my classes — very kind and considerate. Cathy had a great love for our Catholic faith and for her family. My life was enriched in knowing her!
John McNamara
Coordinator of Catholic Bible Studies
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Some memories:
Lunch @ Wolf’s Deli and Eileen O’Keefe asking for a pork sandwich.
Going to the Bottom of the Barrel and some characters sat near us with an umbrella and it wasn’t raining. When we got up we discovered they took Eileen’s purse.
It was always a pleasure to meet you both in the city for lunch and catch up on what was happening in our lives. The last time Cathy gifted me with a beautiful gold bow pin, which I always wear.
Long-time friend Marie Schmid
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Not growing up in the city, I didn’t get to see Mona as often as my cousins, but I always loved visiting her and my Grandmother on Boyd Ave. I do remember many visits to our house when I was very young. Mom and Dad didn’t go away much but when they did, Aunt Mona watched us overnight. I was so excited that my Aunt was visiting, since she always came with little presents for us.
There’s a moment that I don’t think I ever shared with her from Mary Jane and Larry’s Wedding. After they got married in the church, we were in the catering hall where they had a Jewish Ceremony. Gerry, Pat and I were in the wedding, so we wearing yam akas. Aunt Mona smiled at me, acknowledging how proud she was of all of us for taking part in the Jewish ceremony, and for whatever reason I started laughing to myself. I looked over at my sister-in-law Peggy who also smiled and when she saw me laughing to myself, she started laughing. Before I knew it, for no good reason, I could not stop laughing. Gerry started laughing, Peggy started laughing, Mary Jane even started laughing and I disrupted the whole ceremony . . . it is such a vivid memory because Mona’s infectious smile started the whole chain of events.
Nephew Eddie Ryan
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We met back in the early 50’s when I came to work in the office she already worked in. I believe she introduced herself as Kay Ryan then. Our friendship grew from there. We had lunch together every day and soon Peggy Casey came to join us. The only way we could do “stuff” together on weekends would be to stay overnight at one or the other’s homes. When it was her turn, we would take the IRT to her parents’ apartment in the south Bronx. She introduced me to the Hibernian dances that were so popular back then. More than once, we went on vacation together. On the first one, she suggested going to a place in the Catskills near Calicoon, NY. It turned out to be another experience for me into the world of Irish dancing. By then, I was really enjoying this new activity, Irish dancing. Cathy would find a way to inject humor in every minute of our adventures. You know she had a special way of doing that.
I don’t know how much she told you about life at ELAS before she met you, but we would find funny situations in just about everything. Remember, we were only nineteen years old.
Speaking of our age, that is when we started exchanging “nasty” birthday cards. She never let me forget that I was two months older. Every year, for sixty-four years, she would remind me of that. And then for the next two months, I would hunt for the perfect “nasty” card to get back at her.
Fast forward to the early sixties. I was married and had two boys ages two and one when she came to visit us. She was single at the time and quickly named our boys “the tension brothers”. Years later, she and Mike brought Ryan out to meet us. He must have been about 8 or 9. I marveled at the way Mike and her made sure Ryan understood and enjoyed every new experience.
A friendship that has lasted for 64 years is a treasure in itself, and the friendship that Catherine and I shared taught me so much about courage and kindness and most importantly, trust in God.
Long-time friend Marie Mollo
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I have a lot of memories about my wonderful and sweet Mommy, but I want to select the best few ones for explaining how Mommy sacrificed herself to help me to develop into a fine adult.
Story #1:
Mommy told me at once that her doctors wanted her to make the decision of letting me go out of her womb before I was even born because of the great possibility of my handicap due to her German Rubella disease during her pregnancy. Mommy did not hesitate to keep me as her beloved and dear baby because she always loves me regardless how Deaf I am. Thank you, Mommy! God bless you, Mommy, for your excellent choice!
Story #2:
Mommy was one of a few people who were mainly responsible for my academic and professional success. Mommy was always strict with my promptness, my organization, and my “Try Your Best” attitude. Consequently, I became a very disciplined, serious, and hard-working student and employee. I was able to survive some of impossible college professors by earning many A’s and few B’s. I also earned the Employee of the Month award three times in my whole professional career. Thank you, Mommy!
Story #3:
Mommy and I were great rivals of the board game titled “Scrabble”, but we had a lot of fun since we chatted about many different topics at the same time. I guess that we played over 1,000 games during our entire lifetime! I miss you for being my fun and great opponent, Mommy!
Story #4:
During my high school career, there was a very high percentage of hearing students failing one of the most difficult New York State regents exam (Global History). My Deaf school did not help me to study for this exam. I believe that the main reason was that my Deaf school already knew about the tough statistics and my Deaf school greatly doubted my ability to pass this exam. Mommy decided to coach and train me; we worked very hard together. As a result, I earned a passing grade of 77 on this exam. This shocked my Deaf school and many of my Deaf peers. Thank you, Mommy!
Story #5:
English Composition was one of my worst college courses since I always hate writing and I often struggle with my English Grammar because English is my second language. About 75% of my Deaf peers failed this course and the Exit Exam. Passing the Exit Exam was the mandatory requirement of passing this course. I was extremely nervous when I was taking this exam, but Mommy sent many special prayers for me. Consequently, I passed this exam without any problems and earned an “A” in this course. What a big miracle! Believe me, I still have some English Grammar mistakes. Thank you, Mommy!
Story #6:
I hesitated going to the Graduate School because I always dread any writing assignments, especially Masters Thesis. Mommy pushed me to try entering into the Graduate School. What happened? I earned my Masters of Science degree in Information Technology after I experienced some long struggles with my Masters Thesis. Thank you, Mommy!
Story #7:
Mommy was the most generous person that I ever had seen. Mommy never stopped giving a lot of nice surprises like nice dinners, a few lottery tickets, prayer cards, Cerra the Pig (my favorite stuffed animal), brainteaser toys, National Geographic books, nice work clothes, and much more. Thank you, “Everyday Santa Claus” Mommy!
Story #8:
Mommy instilled the importance of reading into my childhood. Mommy used to take me to public libraries for reading fairs and subscribed me to the National Geographic magazine in early 1983. I am still a member of the National Geographic Society. I consider Mommy as another Uncle Tom since both of them are avid readers. Thank you, “Smart” Mommy!
Story #9:
Mommy taught me very well about our Catholic faith. Mommy gave up a lot of her spare time for working with me on three important sacraments (First Holy Communion, Sacrament of Penance, and Confirmation) and Mommy demonstrated her incredible patience of explaining some difficult concepts of our Catholic Church to me. Now I am able to do Lectio Divina using my own French missal and other Catholic magazines everyday. Thank you, Mommy!
Note that I am aware that I should use the word “she” in order to replace the word “Mommy”, but I want to emphasize that Mommy is one of my most important people in my entire life.
I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU VERY MUCH, MOMMY!
Loving son Ryan Griske
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Three memories come to mind: 1- Decorating your Xmas tree in the Bronx and Hicksville with Cathy, Mike, Diane and myself. It had 1,343,497 branches. I understand that Ryan now has the tree. (Could he now possibly have all the branches?) Those were pleasant memories. 2- Taking a picture of Cathy and Mike at the Red Rose Inn in Long Island. I got some good smiles from Cathy when I kept jumping up and down 45 times. 3- We visited your Hicksville house at Xmas time (the 1,343,497 branch tree was up). I was very proud of the fancy cookies we brought as a gift. Cathy mentioned Ryan had brought home from his job many cookies. With fake reluctance, I offered to relieve you and Cathy of our cookies. Cathy thought that this was very funny. We were glad that this made her laugh. We are pleased that you are including us in your memories. Long-time friends Diane & Al Skolnik Mike’s Note: Al is Jewish, so Cathy and I always chuckled when we remembered how much fun he had helping us to decorate our Christmas tree.
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Whenever I think of Cathy/Mona, I always think of her smile. She’s always so generous with it. Whenever we run into each other, she greets me with a large smile and her twinkling eyes. We talk and laugh, and I just know I’m in the presence of a good, kind, sweet woman. I always feel better because I spoke with her.
Family friend Kathy Carley
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I don’t remember the first time that I met Mona, but it was probably in 1970 or ’71 when we were both working at the Manhattan headquarters of The Equitable Life Assurance Society. We really got to know each other well when we were assigned by our respective bosses to work together in developing training packages for a new Equitable computer system. By the time our projects were completed, I was so very fond of Mona that I asked her out on a date, and we’ve been inseparable ever since except for my occasional out-of-town business trips.
To be honest, though, she was a bit hesitant to accept my marriage proposal because even though we deeply loved each other and had many interests in common, I was 14 years her junior, and our backgrounds were quite different: east vs. west, big city vs. small town, large vs. small families, extremely proper vs. a bit wild at times, a strong belief in the Catholic faith vs. a skeptical attitude about certain Catholic teachings, etc. But needless to say, I finally wore her down, and the rest is history.
I’ll be pausing every day to remember our lives together, which were filled with big events like our wedding day, the birth of our only child Ryan and his wedding day, trips to places such as the Pacific Northwest, cities in California such as San Diego, San Francisco, and L.A., Disneyland and Disney World, national parks in Utah, Arizona, Colorado, New Mexico, and Maine, casinos in Atlantic City, Las Vegas, and Connecticut because we enjoyed trying our luck at the slots, even when we lost — which was almost always —upstate New York attractions like Niagara Falls when Ryan was going to college in Rochester, sojourns into Canada and Mexico, and closer to home, taking the “D” train and later, the LIRR, into the city to see a Broadway play, the Radio City Christmas Show, or a WNBA Liberty game after viewing the Manhattan skyline, if we had time, from the Top of the Rock or the Empire State Building . . . and, of course, the many, many family get togethers in Wyoming, Colorado, New York, and Pennsylvania throughout the years.
But even in the short time that we’ve now been apart, I already know that it’ll be the simple pleasures we shared that I’ll miss the most: celebrating birthdays and holidays with a few presents, a good meal, and Ryan when he could make it; watching movies on TV at night; going to karaoke at Leisure Village because Mona liked to hear me sing off-key, attending Bible study sessions, watching the swans at Mt. Sinai Harbor or the ocean waves at Fire Island beaches . . . or just spending moments together reminiscing.
While Mona was in Stony Brook Hospital after her stroke, I mentioned in an email to Barbara Ryan, one of our nieces, that perhaps God’s plan was to let Mona go to Him in relative peace and comfort — the state in which she seemed to be at that time —as a reward for her 82 years of unselfish devotion to family and friends. I only know
that I could never have found a better wife for me, or a better mother for Ryan. Those thoughts are helping me to be at peace now that she’s gone.
On the day Mona passed away, we had some fairly violent thunderstorms on Long Island in the afternoon, which may have been Mona knocking on Heaven’s Gate already. If God let any souls in that day, they would undoubtedly have included our beloved Mona.
Devoted husband Mike Griske
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On the night Ryan and I got engaged, Mrs. Griske was waiting at home with great anticipation. I remembered returning to their home and she was already at the door. You can see on her face that this was just as an exciting moment for her, as it was for us. I remember her saying, “Congratulations” and “What an exciting time!” She was just so excited that her baby is now getting married. She wanted pictures of us so badly and then we took pictures together. All that came to my mind was, “Wow this is going to be my mother in law to be!”
Fast forward to just after Ryan and I got married, after watching Ryan swim his laps in the pool, Mrs. Griske and I went to meet Mr. Griske and Ryan at the beginning of the golf course near their Ridge home. As the guys started their short form of golf, I remember the nice talk we had about the family and all the things that were coming during the summer. We laughed about me trying to figure out who is which uncle’s or aunt’s son or daughter. She always had pride in her family, especially Ryan.
Daughter-in-law Corinne Griske
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I have a lot of memories of Aunt Mona. A couple that stand out are the Ryan family picnic in Van Cortland Park where she wore a very modern disposable dress. Only problem was it rained on our picnic, as it very often did, and her dress was made of paper. I also remember when my Dad was teaching her to drive and one day I went with him to pick her up at the railroad station. She drove the 8 blocks home in a record 35 minutes.
“She was very good to me. She took me with her on a few vacations when I younger ….Williamsburg, Lancaster, etc. She gave me my first car loan to get my 1971 Chevy Nova….She invited me to spend time with her in her little bachelorette pad on Katonah Ave…..and let me eat whatever I wanted for dinner….even potato chips….
“These were pre-Mike and Ryan memories. We lost touch for a while during which time I was raising my kids and she was living in Colorado. I was happy to reconnect in more recent years when our kids were grown. I appreciate her hanging around in the hospital these last 2 weeks to give us a chance to get used to her not being around any more and to tell her goodbye. I will miss her, but am grateful for the memories.”
Niece Maureen Dodge
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In addition to the memories I hold and have documented in the family tree a few years ago, which go all the way back to Boyd Ave in the Bronx, and continue through Hicksville and Ridge, I would like to add another right to the heart of how Aunt Mona stands out in my history. Yes, she was always there for all the big moments in my life, right from the start when she was a teenager and agreed to be my Godmother, to the Christmas visits in the Bronx, in Queens and most recently in Ridge, and faithfully with every birthday card, Christmas card and many other correspondences including letters, notes, and E-mails. Aunt Mona and Uncle Mike gave me the honor of being Ryan’s Godfather, and so I guess you can say the Circle of Life is present in a small way.
The memory I’ve been referring to is when I was in my teens, anyone who knows me knows I became a fan of the Beatles, a rock group from Liverpool, England. (Aunt Mona would giggle and call me silly, because she understood and appreciated my sometimes understated sense of humor). That’s, by the way, the way I always think of her – with that quiet laugh. Anyway, when I turned 15, The Beatles released “Beatles 65”, and I wanted it so much. I was struggling in my sophomore year in High School and was despairing of deserving the album for my birthday, but somehow my Lovely Godmother became my Fairy godmother, and made my wish come true. She gave me the record
(although I couldn’t open and listen to it until I passed something in school). I’ll never forget that. Then, not two years later, during the “summer of love”, I somehow managed to graduate… June ’67, and to mark the occasion, The Beatles released “Sgt.Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band”. As a gift, Aunt Mona gave me a copy. I still have copies of both albums, and always think of her when I listen to them. Which I do quite often.There are as many stories and memories, but in general, I think of the simple ways Aunt Mona was always so thoughtful, preferring to sit and chat and laugh to just about anything. Her Family, Mike, Ryan, Aunt Mary, all the many cousins, Godchildren, friends … All of us will miss her and keep her in our prayers and hearts forever.
Nephew Pat Sexton